Hi. How're you doing?

I'm always in a cranky mood. Not in a bad kinda way, in a good way I think. Some people tell me I'm crazy. Well the truth is, I'm not. I just like to play around and joke around. But I take that as a compliment thank you. I'm feeling a little high, a little restless, a little dancey-movey. So right now, I'm gonna tell you guys about my 3 classic and trademarked responses that can be used in all* situations that happen in my life.

Number 1 is used whenever anyone tells me that I'm lame (as in uncool in teenager jargon).

Someone: Hey Jas! That's like so lame la!
Me: What lame?! Do I look like I'm in a wheelchair?!

This usually results in the other person telling me I'm the lamest person on Earth. But, whatever!

Number 2 is used to good effect especially whenever I talk to my boss.

Someone: Jasmine I feel like boxing you!
Me: What?! You can't! I'm square enough!

Please don't say this to your boss cause your boss is not like my boss, able to tolerate my nonsense. And your boss probably doesn't say she wants to box you a lot. That's a good thing.

Number 3 is used whenever someone (my boss in particular), tells me that they want to kill me.

Someone: Jasmine I really want to kill you!
Me: (In a very calm and grown-up voice) Did you know that murder is punishable by hanging?

Very very good thing to say to end a conversation that involves the word kill. It is never mentioned again till the next day.

Hope you enjoyed this funny segment. Just a way to cure my crankiness today. And just in case you were wondering, the asterisk behind the "all" has it own conditions. It just simply means these situations happen to me a lot. It seems like I get death threats all day, and the award of the lamest of all-time.

Only kidding! Take care!

Mr Darcy: You have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you.

7:08 PM.